Beyond I Love You

Guess what, people around me seem to love hearing/reading/gossiping (I’m not so famous though) about my non-existent (maybe) relationship. rolls on the floor laughing (rotfl). This is because, whenever I post stuff relationship themed it definitely gets a way moreeeeee hits than the other posts! Like that’s so unfair, how would my other normal posts feel (if they were humans)?

FYI, I utter the phrase ‘I Love You’ almost thousands of times a week (I’m so lazy to count). Before you start making assumptions, I actually say that almost every night to Mrs. Home Minister (Mr. Prime Minister is too cool for that) which makes it one of the frequently uttered sentences in a week. But here’s a phrase which would go beyond the number of times I’ve said I Love You **drumroll**        **mankathabgm**

Aiyoo, I’m so tired la.

Surprise! See what I did there. You might have thought that an ‘I love you’ is always followed by ‘I miss you’  but as for me:

I    A M    T I R E D.   A L W A Y S.

And guess what?! The whole world (I mean aunties in church) has told me that I look tired. They’ve said it to me like zillion times (I swear  promise – mumzie said cannot swear swear all)! I used to look like a marshmallow – round, tiny and adorable (I assume + people G said so) but here’s how I am right now:

I don’t look like an extreme mess, but you get the point – I’m tired.

I guess it’s because I’ve got lots of stuff up in my cauliflower (I mean my head) which I’ve got to settle and I’m constantly looking at my phone, my planner, my phone. Well, that’s because I don’t want to miss a thing and cause chaos.

I haven’t caused ‘chaos’ so far but here’s something similar which I did. (and I felt, feel and will continuing feeling bad):

Recently, I didn’t put Lin’s birthday on my calendar, thinking that I’d remember the date properly. All I did was, call her 2 days in advance at 12am (sharp) and yell ‘Happy Birthday’ in my high pitched voice. I. was. so. dumb. How did I forget the date! Obviously, she was chuckling away at my misery. I’ve been seeing and wishing Lin every year for the past 7 years in school and then this year I do something so so so silly. Don’t worry she’s still super duper close friends with me. But I think that’s just because I know lots about her and I can blackmail her incase she ‘unfriends’ me.

I’ve had lots of memories with her back in high school and she’s definitely one person I can always talk to despite being away (and busy) for long! I miss the dumb stuff we did in school. She was my private investigator, poem partner (she writes all the sad poems & stories), annoying deskmate (idk how I could bear with her for 5 years) and my radio karat (she sings with her considerably bad + okay nightingale – like voice [had to change, or she’ll be mad]).

I had to look through a bunch of old photos on my laptop to get this photo of us 5 years ago:

15 year old Naina, Lindevi and myself.

I hope you rock a saree on my wedding day (front row seats if you do!).

Honestly, I’ve got loads of memories with many of my friends back from school, so much that I can write a book. I should probably start a segment/category called “Messy Monday Memories”. The last I saw my bunch of high school friends was 2 years back (I guess). Idk where they are right now, but incase y’all are reading this – I MISS YOU COCONUTS.

On another note, I’m just hoping that this “tiredness” of mine doesn’t continue. I definitely don’t want to forget any other important dates.

Attn: Mrs. Home Minister, would you please not give me free lectures that I’m always hanging on my phone? See the extent of damage I suffer when I try living without it!

(P.s. despite the title, this post wasn’t about my relationship. hahaha. **evil laugh**)

#JK #samosaforlife #foodrules

Meet Mr Fiancé

It has been quite some time, precisely 1 year+ ever since I got into a relationship, few months ever since I got engaged and I think it’s time you meet Mr. Fiancé. Previously, I’ve mentioned about visiting us at our humble abode here, but I’m assuming many of you are still confused on where we live and on how the heck he looks. So here’s a picture of him (cue: awwww. I’m so sweet). *drumroll*

Tadaa. Lo and behold, my future in red. He’s so sweet, caring, loving, torturing, stressful and so much more that ‘his’ parents decided to name him – ACCA, Think Ahead.

He has been playing such a biggggg (I cannot emphasise more) role in my life, so much that I’m wondering who, when and how am I supposed to get married (to a real human, of course). Mr. Fiancé has been the main reason I stopped eating lots of samosa’s and spending lesser time with my family, best friend, friends and everyone else under the sun.

Last week, I had a meeting (I mean Mock Exams) with Mr. Fiancé. Gosh, I was in such a mess, skipping all my other work, running helter skelter to find for my sweater and stationeries. I remember during one of our meetings where I was supposed to take notes (a.k.a writing down answers on the exam paper), I was freaking distracted because of the stuff that were running in my mind and I was using liquid paper (read: correction tape) more than I used my pen! But honestly, I extend my deepest sympathies to the person who’s going to mark my F9 paper though (I’m sorry teacher, incase you’re reading this).

Life is tough with him but nevertheless I said, YES – to love and to cherish every complicated IAS, to honour every single IFRS, to be on time for every 8am class even if it means missing breakfast and wearing jogging pants (I don’t jog, I bought that pants for fun and now I use it to class), to respect all the F-level and P-level papers, to worship all the audit firms for 3 years till I become certified Chartered Accountant and then to follow all the preset rules by the aunties’ of my society to get married fast etc etc… (Sorry the person you’re trying to contact is self-willed, please try again later for an illechevai.

That’s how ‘exciting’ my life has been people 😛 But hey, I’m still happy with all the zillions of stuff which have been happening too.

To whomever who has been waiting when the world would I post something true about my relationship(s), I suggest you keep waiting till Jesus comes. Amen. Blessed Easter (I’m so good at changing topics, Hallelujah!).

xoxo till the next time I rant write,

SSpice.

[ps: illechevai – I’m still finding how to explain it in english]

Corporate Social Responsibility

Our aunties (especially if they’re Indian) are unreputable when it comes to corporate social responsibility (CSR). They are so into it that you’ll forget about Microsoft, Google and Walt Disney company – the top 3 companies for CSR (no need to be so sibuk and Google, I got this from Forbes). 

Why do I say so?

this is self-explanatory

Well, they’re just are super duper caring nowadays [read: busy body (dictionary), menjaga tepi kain orang lain (find this in your peribahasa book)]

Once you’re done with SPM they make sure you get into college and you’ve got to choose based on what the whole world wants except yourself. Don’t accidentally tell them you are interested in becoming an artist, they’ll say inthe paint-addikerethela orru vellaiah? ollunga paadi! (translated as- is painting even a job? Study properly!) Then, after a few years they’ll be interested in knowing when you’ll graduate as if they’re the owners of Jobstreet whereas they’re just CEOs of VaayadiStreet. (vaayadi – talkative)

Two years will pass by and then someday they’ll say their brother’s son’s daughter’s son’s great grandson (just exaggerating, but you get the point – they just try to introduce some stranger) is available, has a big car, good job etc. And you’ll be like, hello, I’m not going to live in his car/at his office so why bother telling me? Come on aunntyyyy, there’s Instagram, Facebook (I can’t think of any other social media because these are currently dominating) and if we are super interested in your uncle’s son’s great grandson we saw at a wedding, we’ll do the stalking and the talking – of course.

You name it, we’ll do – if we’re are super interested. You want the fella’s bestfriend’s sister’s name for your son – we got you covered. Where he works – we’ll go do some field work and inspection to find his office. If he likes someone else – we’ll hire an undercover in his office itself. His favourite food – the restaurant owner nearby house/office will become our bff. A list dumb things he did when he was 14 – his facebook will be our source of evidence. This is how we roll these days. (Anyways, now that I love eating Samosa, I stopped rolling this way long back)

If we needed your advice on what to study, when to get married, whom to get married to, how our wedding should be etc etc, they would have appointed y’all as counselors in our university, but sadly, they didn’t, therefore, P.L.E.A.SE. L.E.A.V.E. U.S. Don’t get us wrong, we love your scrumptious cooking but we’d love you more if you don’t be Auntypedia (senior version of Wikipedia) and try to silently rule our lives with your perceptions. So aunty, don’t bother calling our mums and arrekeraning (lecturing) them on how to manage their girls, okay?

Love,

the 21st Century’s free-spirited-ladies.

(p.s. no offence to all the super-nice aunties all there. This was for fun, but incase the above rings a bell, please stop doing likewise 😛 )

Celebrating Valentine’s

Incase you are reading this post on the 13th /14th February, there are high chances that either you’re single, a rational human being (here’s a medal), or plainly an accountant/auditor to-be. Anyway, here’s what you’ve saved yourself from –

1. buying a handful of overpriced chocolates,

2. rushing out of the house at 4pm to reach that fancy dinner place or else you’ll be stuck in the jam (jam as in traffic jam, not in a bottle of blueberry jam!),

3. praying that the petals in the bouquet of flowers stay in-tact till it reaches whoever it’s supposed to

4. trying to smell good by emptying 1/2 of your bottle of perfume (you’d smell so good -no need to mandi for the next whole week)

5. pulling off the whole romantic look, ensuring you don’t look like a vampire with that mascara thingy.

6. trying make everything “on-point” and “lit”, as if the world is gonna end tomorrow night and you’ll never have another day to celebrate with your significant half.

The list goes on and on, but wait – when was the last people (and by saying people, I mean you) realised that they should be celebrating their loved ones everyday? You think they exist on the day before Valentine’s day then pooff, gone in a puff of smoke?

Beside’s, I got to my senses and realised that Valentine’s day usually means siding/supporting/pampering/ spoiling women (which is goooood!). However, the last time I checked, men were a part of the human race too!

#BoyfriendGoalsBox. Such a pretty flat lay and the stuff cost RM 300. pc: RADKL

The above picture is obviously for girls, but why don’t I see similar stuff for guys – talk about equality here.

Here’s what I found (nothing indecent since I did my own research/assumption) for the ultimate #GirlfriendGoalsBox:

1.  The last time I got lectured regarding some comic-thingy, there was something called DC Comics and Marvel. If your fella likes gaming and Marvel (don’t buy this if he is a DC Comics fan, he’ll just run away – I guess) you can get this from Amazon, it’s approximately RM 570. Besides loving you and your life, he will love this mouse next. Here’s a tip – make sure you use your own money, credit card or what ever which keeps you safe so that you don’t have to face the Supreme Judge & lawyers (a.k.a your parents) in court (the living room at home). They might give you serupaddi if they find out you bought a mouse for a freaking RM 570 (the things we do to show our love).

2. Buy him stuff he’s always wanted even though sometimes you might not like it. For example, the keyboard below – I would put this in a tadika computer lab to encourage kids to be IT savvy because it looks so colourful. You’d never know how life-changing/life-enhancing it can be for him. (hahahahaha, I’m tryna imagine myself buying this)

3. Cook something out of love since everybody loves food! Even if it turns out crappy he’ll be happy to try it and then maybe you guys can order McD/PizzaHut/any other food which tastes like food.

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After all these years, I don’t really see why people are gung-ho celebrating each other for a day and not really for the rest of their lives. Like hello, what’s the point of celebrating only for February 14th? They sell chocolates/roses/mouses/keyboards/clothes/insert anything you feel like getting – for the rest of the year too, get them occasionally to surprise him or her.

Don’t get me wrong, you can buy roses, flowers, a flower pot, or even the entire Cameron Highlands and Holland (their tulips are so beautiful) for Valentine’s. But I’m 101% sure your efforts are going to be of waste if you don’t have something priceless to offer in your relationship.

Here is something money can’t buy, not only this Valentine’s but all through out your life – Honesty, Sincerity and True Love.

(runs to get the Samosa)

If not for those, you might end up buying dozens of roses, boxes of chocolates or cooking for a different person each year (so not fun and it takes a lot of tissues).

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Therefore, this Valentine’s,take my tip (you can thank me later)…

• Stop creating constructive obligations for the following years. Mind your own business (MYOB) and celebrate love all year round, except today!
• If Mr/Ms. Best Half offers you that Marvel Mouse thingy/ the pretty look box with 6 tiny macaroons and other stuff, tell them :-

“As per the ACCA code of Ethics and Conduct the presents are not of modest value and might impair your judgement when future misunderstandings occur. Politely decline the gifts offered(even though you badly want them).”

Pheww… I just revised a teeny weeny bit of IAS 37 and Professional Ethics (Audit).

 

Trial Month Over

My trial month a.k.a January 2017 didn’t turn out to be that bad. Here’s the inside scoop. (this might be a long post and incase you are busy, I demand that you still continue reading it- jkjk).

Petite Picasso

You should follow me on instagram, not because I post nice pictures of myself and not-so-nice pictures (I call them candid) of others -jkjk, but purely because Insta Stories is where I showcase my talent- in drawing (don’t you dare tell me those are scribblings).

I got engaged

This was supposed to be a top secret but I didn’t want people to miss me, so here’s the truth (lies, a lorry full of lies). I got engaged this Monday at 8.05 am. The engagement took place in my email – from ACCA, which sent shivers down my spine. Honestly, I’ve never been so scared of a damn email. It was bitter sweet, taking my relationship to the next phase. So much harder, yet blissful. Hopefully, I end up marrying him.

It took me a week to decide if my future husband and I would adopt a few kids. I decided to go with 3 and named them F7, F8, F9 (sorry, no nicer names available) . After class, I went to visit Mr.Hubby at his apartment and you can visit (us) too. Here’s our address incase you feel like paying a visit : HF 5661, Tun Hussein Onn Library, Sun-U. I’ve attached a picture too, so that you don’t lose your way find us. Complimentary samosas upon arrival (coz I love ’em) but  you might be chased out of the premises.

Behold, our humble abode

To commemorate, our engagement, I bought/stole from G goodies for myself. I’m counting on these stuff to help me raise my kids. Having invested an initial investment of RM 20 ++ for highlighters and pens (more to buy) hopefully, these kids of mine have a Payback Period of 6 months. I expect a positive return on investment (ROI) and I hope they don’t devise plans to senju me.

ACCA-engaged starter pack

Sorry, I didn’t have time and space to do engagement photo shoots, plus I didn’t want to look like a kirruke (mad person) posing with books in the library.

And here’s my two cents – incase you’d like to learn wth is payback period or ROI feel free to take CAT, ACCA, sacrifice your sleep, food, life, everything else and wait till you learn it in F9. (You can thank me once you register)

It’s probably going to take me a few more years depending on how fast or slow I want to commit and become a full time life-less person (not stating it here or else all the CCTV aunties will ask when I’m getting married, moving out, working, buying car/house/lorry/whatever la).

For sure I’ll be marrying the love of my life someday (real human) but till then, ACCA I’ll be with you till graduation do us part.