12 days in a year, 12 unlucky people get to see me lose my temper, go from demure to devilish in 1 minute. Wait, 1 minute is too long, 30 seconds would be a realistic estimate. Occasionally more than twelve of them get to see me in that state. These ‘people’ are usually dadzie, mumzie, G, Bridesmaid Band or my bunch of college friends. On the other 350++ days, I’m kind, nice and justifiably tolerant (please refer to the picture below).
Well on the tolerant scale, I perform a wayyy better than G. For example, if a lil baby pees on me (on either of the 350++ days not the 12 days!) I’d graciously say its okay, go home and wash my clothes. Trust me, this has happened, on my school high school uniform somemore. But if it happens to G, oh. my. Lord, she will call the entire household, display her ‘eeeww its pee’ face and demand to go home immediately. But if the peeing takes place on me, on one of the 12 days, idk how I’ll react. So yeah, you gotta wait till someone in church gives birth till I can experiment this out.
But there are times where G performs really well in the tolerating department much more than I do. On those days, I kinda think Jesus is coming soon.
Forget about the peeing babies & G. Let’s talk about this pain.
It’s excruciating and you’ve got no one to ask why me (except the gender and gene department a.k.a your parents, lol). Generally, I’m like #feminist #girlboss #GirlsCanDoAnything and on these 12 days I’m like #whywasntiaboy.
1. Accept the pain?
They say that pain helps you to evolve and grow, you should accept pain etc etc.
Now the question is does period pain even help you grow?
Then whyy the heck am I stuck at 152 cm since 17. (thou shall not insult. I know I’m so short, but I can walk with 4-5 inch heels, lu boleh ?) Maybe period pain has helped all the girls around me grow and (I guess) I’m just from the midget family. But then… incase you’ve met them – dadzie, mumzie and G are of normal height, I’m the adorable sized one. Anyways, midget pun jadilah ‘coz it allows me to get away with anything under the sun.
2. No one to blame
Usually, when someone causes you pain, you either just pray for them like what Jesus says, or you can be like me and think/write sarcastic things about them. Another option is to walk up and just slap/punch them in the face. However, with Ms. Period Pain, the tables have turned – I can’t be slapping myself all day long or writing sarcastic lines about blood. Pathetically, there are times where I scrunch my face, limp and saying “Oh Lord save me please” – this has been my longest prayer today. Amen.
3. Just like fingerprints.
No two girl’s (period) pain
story reality is the same. Some of them are fortunate enough to have a smooth week, some survive minor discomfort, some fall into the ‘painful like Kezia’s’ category and then there are women who have worseeee cramps that I do, they faint, cry, somersault, idk what else and all.
So dear people out there, incase you’ve got girlfriends out there, for heavens sake don’t got around saying, how come so and so doesn’t whine about period like you do?
4. To have or not to have.
There were times I lacked intellect and actually thought to myself how nice life as a girl would have been without having to grow up, attain age, eat raw eggs, drink oil (trust me, I did, after throwing tantrums and saying that the oil is U-turning at my throat), and then be ‘blessed’ with this pain every. single. month.
Incase you didn’t eat raw eggs and drink gingerly oil, please give me your number so that Mrs. Home Minister can contact you / your mum and give you a free ceramah titled:
Big Girl Must Haves : Eggish Eggs & Oogly Oil
( I created the title. Creative right? )
But then again, this whole egg, oil, pain and pain again process, completes being a women. It’s like you can go around saying.
Menstruation – All rights reserved. Only for women.
And guess what, this is one thing men won’t fight for, for all the obvious reasons – they can’t endure the pain and everything that comes with it. Incase you dont know what else comes with it, please ah dont be so bodoh, go back and study Form 3 science or Form 5 Biology.
So men, you can carry all those barbells / dumbbells / dumb-whatever in gyms and not be able to compare that pain to this one. Sometimes it takes tender souls to tackle treacherous pain.
But kesian the fellas also la okay. Not all are morons, mangkuks and pinggans. Some of them are really nice, like my friends. They bully you throughout the month but then when it’s time, they really take good care of you. Fill your water bottle zillion times, insult you lesser, dont pull you hair / knock your head in class, buy you food, listen to your whines and ask you if your okay 10 times. Incase you need to lepaskan geram, I treat them like a punchbag / adivangi , coz they are bigger in size than I am. How I miss Dave, Narr and Muths, I bet they dont miss me. (Coconuts)
So, there are some days, like today, where I rant non-stop regarding my pains. However, when I think of those girls who’ve been waiting for months for this to happen, I’m definitely blessed. I know of some friends who’ve struggled with menstruation, causing them further complications, and compared to that, oh Lord, I rather go through this blessing in disguise. And today I pray that all those girls get their period faster and have the same pain because #GirlsCanDoAnythingincludingHandlePeriodPain
“Sakit itu sementara, jadi Wanita itu selamanya” (btw, I modified this line by Cheryl Fernando in her movie, Adiwiraku)
Hallelujah! Sings ROARRR by Katy Perry. Period Pain who?
On another note, I got the #GirlsCanDoAnything from AirAsia, probably they should consider my new hashtag #GirlsCanDoAnythingincludingHandlePeriodPain for their next campaign.
Dear Tan Sri Tony Fernandes / Ms Aireen Omar, incase you read the above my name is Ruth Kezia Hope Muthu and you can email me at email@example.com for all business inquiries. Thank you ❤
Sending Lots of Love whilst in pain, – Kezia.